Thursday, April 16, 2009

Letting go

Been approaching life a bit different lately ... letting go of expectations and desires for specific outcomes and finding much more joy in the present. A co-worker asked me today what my preference would be for the department of one that I currently head up. After thinking about the question, I responded that the best outcome, in my opinion for the bank would be for the department to be absorbed as part of the corporate culture - meaning there would be a consideration of environmental issues in all that we do as a bank. But that would mean that my position would no longer be necessary - unless they kept me on as a content expert or knowledge officer... which at this bank would be unlikely.
The best outcome for me professionally would be to grow a division around environmental lending initiatives. But then that would turn me into a manager, limiting my public contact and making my focus more on reports than on business development or outreach. I don't have much interest in reports.
So, in total, the preferred outcome would be for me to become expendable ... the follow on question was, "so, are you okay with that?" My response ... sure ... I am not overly tied to either outcome ... just enjoying what I am doing today and working on growing the philosophy and approach within the bank and out into the community. The experience and visibility are both good for me from a resume perspective. My hope is that I will be able to leverage this time into international travel. I think I am starting to get it ... Buddhists call this compassionate objectivity ... feeling without taking possession. I like that message.

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